Thursday 13 June 2013

2013: THE MONEY CURSE Pt. 5 - GOV'T TELLS JABALS: "TAKE BUS! WE'RE TRYING TO SAVE $$$$!"

Jabals and other outside women all over the island are slowly but surely finding that there is no more free ride  in government vehicles from the other woman's man. As government's efficiency measures start to take effect, even some wives and legitimate girlfriends are finding that their taxpayer funded privileges are disappearing.
Jabal crying: Kenny tell them take bus.

Government officials insists that they are not deliberately targeting jabals.

"Jabals are a very important part of the economic and social fabric," said a spokesperson. "Without jabals, most marriages could not last and the divorce rate would skyrocket. Also without jabals, many of the clothing stores, cosmetic boutiques and jewelry establishments would go completely out of business as men would have no reason to ask their wives for forgiveness."

The government is trying to impress on citizens that the measures which are affecting jabals are merely part of  more global cost saving measures. For example:

Government plans to make mergers easier for local and foreign businesses who are not in distress. Why? “To prevent distress. But that’s just preventative stuff to help the private sector keep paying taxes.

Other coming public sector improvements include paying online, electronic document management system, fleet monitoring and tracking systems (there goes the public jabal transportation system).

Government also needs to draft about 60 pieces of legislations that they can’t do now because of limited drafting resources.

“We need a director of legislative drafting and to hire new consultants. Oh no. Did you say hire more consultants?

The new laws are apparently economic. They will help realize existing trade agreements and open up new opportunities.


New government buildings are supposed to help reduce government’s rent bill.

Jabals will be glad to know that the government has made no move against the culture of saloptay that keeps jabals as one of the most cherished and enjoyed cultural phenomena in the island.

No comments:

Post a Comment