The goddam pie chart |
“You have such good content. Why do you feel the need to
curse? You’re short changing yourself.”
Aunty Junie was not the only person who was complaining
about the willfully gratuitous and excessive use of expletives in The FLOGG.
But she is the least of my problems. Aunty Cynthia and Aunty Martha taught me
how to write and read. They cured a learning disability I had in early
childhood without disrupting me in the least. I was in an out of Dunnotar (St
Lucia’s first special education school) so fast, I hardly ever remember that it
was my first school. They are good Christian ladies. I do NOT want them to see
this blog. And OMG, what will Uncle Harry say? Thank God Uncle Dave was going
blind before they got internet at his house. I don’t want my cousin Warren or
anyone reading this stuff to him. Why?
Yes Lord...I got it |
Because I curse. A lot. Seemingly for no good reason.
But there are good reasons. Let me explain:
Words are just words. What is really provocative and
offensive about The FLOGG? The ideas. The audacity. The convention-killing
courage. The FLOGG is dangerous and offensive
because it successfully
attacks the status quo over and over and over again, with very
little possibility of recrimination as the owners, managers and editors have
nothing to lose and everything to gain from doing exactly what the rest of the media fears.
For those who didn't get the fucking pie chart |
The offensiveness of the f-word is a fucking
anachronism. What is offensive is not
the word ‘fuck’. It is the vehemence with which I use it. I could attain that
vehemence using other more family friendly words. But vehemence, when
appropriate, should not be circumscribed or curbed. Furthermore,
self-censorship is the worst form of censorship and I’ve done enough of that in
my life. And that is the first reason,
when it comes to cursing, that I must insist of saying, fuck that shit.
Another reason for excessive and gratuitous offensive
language is competition in the media. It’s off the charts. St Lucia has more
newspapers and broadcast stations than many countries with twice our
population. Plus the international completion. Adam Smith could not have predicted
what I’m dealing with, starting a content driven media operation.
The
FLOGG aims to get cool and reasonable people, who have otherwise tuned out on
the national political and developmental debate, due to cynicism, to tune back
in….using cynicism as a magnet. Many young people have confessed that they have
no other source of national news than The FLOGG. Sad, but true. (I really need
to get some staff and build a real one-stop shop.)
I have built an audience by
speaking to the young, the free and the intelligent in the language they speak
to each other with. For me to win that audience everyday, I can’t just be
excellent. I need some MODDAFLOGGING SHOCK AND AWE. Those who cannot deal with
it are welcome to go back to the traditional broadcast media where they belong.
I don’t want HTS’ or The Star/Voice’s
audience. There is an audience out there that is specifically FLOGGagenic and I
will FLOGGmatically and FLOGGsistently
keep things as FLOGGalicious as possible in order to satisfy them. Where the
regular media is satisfied to hit the audience with WHAM, BAM, THANK YOU
MA’AM, The FLOGG will also go down on you. And if you insist, (search Allen
Chastanet, Richard Frederick, Mae Wayne on this page.)
The FLOGG will also give it to you up the ass.
Da man eh know how to curse yet |
The language of storytelling achieves three things to
varying degrees, depending on the reader. It describes what we want things to
be, what we pretend things are and sometimes, when we’re lucky, what things
actually are. Now the reality is that most people curse. They do. Most people do not make an effort not to. The
FLOGG is aims to speak of the subject matter of WHAT WE WANT THINGS TO BE in
the language of WHAT IT THINGS REALLY ARE. Traditional media is like high class
Egyptian hieroglyphics, in this context, while The FLOGG is the vernacular
Egyptian used in the street and in trade. Fucking A!
The FLOGG realizes that some people are turned off by the
gratuitous and excessively strong language.
However, The FLOGG also realizes that this shit works and while it might
need some calibration to go truly viral
on a regional or global scale, it is
exactly what the younger, more
intelligent, less engaged audience needed at the time. With
proper management and a good strategy,
The FLOGG will be more qualified to become the true Caribbean CNN/BBC
than CANA or Caribvision or any of them could ever hope to be.
Oh fuck! Shit, sorry, I meant to say "HE SALOP!" |
And so, to those who are offended, there shall be no
apology. Fuck all you backward tightwad assholes.
Except you, June Frederick. We still love and respect you.
And shall refrain from cursing in your personal presence. As we have always
done.
Well said. It should be noted also that this is a particular style of journalism that uses profanity and the writer's own perspective in the story telling. One may want to research Gonzo journalism for further reference. But Most importantly, it works.
ReplyDeleteYou're not one of those weirdos like St Lucia NICE, are you?
ReplyDeleteI respect the need for anonymity, but I would hate to think that this is part of the masked campaign of Pinky and The Brain.