Tuesday, 17 September 2013

RECENT POLITICAL PUNCHLINES AND PAWOL JETTAY


It’s great being Labour.  No matter how you mess up, you can’t possibly do worse than the last government and any little thing you do really does prove that you re 100% better than  them.


Some funny shit said on the official platform.  And at least one very stupid thing utter by an otherwise intelligent ma. Well, maybe more than one. Enjoy.

HAROLD “Paka Pwen Tout” DALSON:

You heard Chastanet talking endless foolishness on the radio. Lies upon lies, like the man talking steroids to lie.

He is worse than Hurricane Tomas. (CAPTION for image of Tomas: Tomas For UWP Leader SLOGAN: I’ll Cause Less Damage Than Chastanet”)

I will invite the leader of the UWP to a session and take any of the kids of my colleagues in government to teach him a course in leadership.

He’s crying, “I want to cut the ribbon x 3.” At the next election, I will cut him from politics. I will send him in political doldrums. As long as he comes up in Soufriere,  he is doomed. Let him go and get a job to bag groceries at one of the J’s.

On facebook he asked ten questions. I want to answer all ten. But we’re putting a big system on the square in Soufriere and I will answer all ten questions in English and Kweyol and I will give him ten questions for him to answer in English and Kweyol. The day he’s ready, tell him I’m ready.

It’s a crying shame for a rich man to take poor people’s money to pay for his election campaign.

I’m going to send Chastanet to an after school program in Soufriere  so they can teach him some kweyol.

 

RKL

THERE is a very good discussion going on in this  country. A discussion that says we want to have discussions on education, we want to discuss issues. That is what the SLP is about. To give the people the right to discuss the issues they want to discuss.

We’ve always had discussions in this country, but the discussion was always one-sided. This country is about saying we want discussion on issues. I, as a parliamentarian, try to discuss issues in this country and I don’t see it discussed in the press of this country. We only discuss the issues the press wants to discuss. Education is about allowing people to discuss issues.

I have my problems. I discuss issues, I argue with Dr Anthony. But I think the way he has characterized is unfair.

 

ALVA ON ALBA

What is the problem with that?

(Editor’s unsolicited commentary: The problem. Um? Iran, their training of ALBA troops and their using ALBA to further their nuclear ambitions? Maybe?  No? You don’t think so?)

 

PJP

Life is strange. Jordi jour Flambea pa vle Labour vin assou Market Steps la. You mean to tell me for years we have spoken on the Market Steps, the university of the Market Steps. And tonight because the Labour Party decde we are going to go the Market Steps all hell break loose. Tout moun ka barbiay. “Blahblahblah (in high pitched voice) You won’t talk about national issues. Hold a press conference.”

They are desperate. They think they can pluck somebody from the sky even though they lose election and they don’t have any seat to run, you will take your leader, you will treat him badly and you will just rise and everybody will just say, “You reach? Ti Jezi wiviay!”

ON FLAMBEAU’S  FOREIGN RELATIONS GENIUS: Remember that the UWP was boasting that Libya would build a bank for us? That there would be endless investment. Look at what happened in Libya. You ever hear that happened in Venezuela or Bolivia? But they believe that we stupid.

ON CHASTANET’S TOURISTIC GENIUS AND MAJESTY: In 2006/11 we spent more money (on tourism marketing) than we ever spent in history and look at the results. Compare that to 2012/13, you will there is an increase of 5% in arrivals and we spent less money. Because we do not waste money on telephone calls!

But that is not in the national interest. The national interest is Kenny, Kenny, Kenny.

ON CHASTANET PARTY CRASHING OF THE OPENING OF BRIDGE: A desperate man begging, ‘invite me. Y’all eh invite me? Invite me.’ (In high pitched voice)

 

 

KENNY

From day one when we got into office, there was this issue of extra-judicial killings.When the visa of a senior police officer was revoked, this  government took action. We were not afraid. We invited the US to come to do polygraph tests, because we decided that no police officer will be promoted to the senior ranks without lie detector tests. Mweh kweh mweh kai mettay Chastanet en bas sa, tan

If they want to debate ALBA, tell them to put a motion before the House. How is me to tell them what to do?

 

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